空白

在写这篇文章的时候，

我的脑袋，

是，



空白的。。



although 2day was gone through in a stabil mood ...

but my mind is in blank ...



many thing keep in my heart ,

very much ...

a very heavy burden ...

until i cannot breath...



like yesterday ,

i would tell a guy that i like to...

tell him my problem...

but he was quiet tired...

and i was not ready 2 tell everyting ...

so that ,

eveything from rice bcome a porridge..

i nv tell everything ....



friendship broke...

family quarrel...

love ...

waiting for him bt mayb he dun noe ...

next year same as me form 5 ...

SPM years...



haha....

stress...



how leh...

how 2 face this year with .......







i lost a frens ...

for me ...

she is a very good frens ...

but now ...we broke down cauz by an activity programme....



i dun't think i was wrong ...

bt she oso nv admit that she's wrong ..

i get a news , she oso hv quarreling with one more frens ....

at about in same situation with me ....

i dun noe y...

in my mind ...

she was a very persistent girl...



in every one mind, she was this kind of girl...

y ...she nv change...

and her change onli in a very very short time ....



y like tis...

i dun noe...

but that day ..

i make a choices..

i decide 2 broke down with her ,

when i ask her : if this problem non b slove in fast ...

we 'll nv b frens again ...



she answer :nvm ..and.....^^



c...

thi is her answer ...

cauz she got say bfore...

i still not her real fren ....

everyone should noe...

when u very respect and value her ...

this answer will make u hurt and heart broke....

that's y ...

i oso try 2make her accept me as her real fren ...



so ...

when i heard her answer ...

i really make my choices b form...

ok ...

u dun care 2 b frens back...

so ...very happy hv been meet "u" bfore...

not meet again...

not bye...





this is my answer ...

not care....

u r not a distinct human ...

frens every where ...

lose one not mean i lose all....







family ...

my relationship with my mum hv gone down ...

cauz of this kind of human ....

firstly i not care on the first quarrel ,

but the 1st quarrel make me and my mum

relationship gone down....





all my fren noe...

my relationship with my mum was nt good on the year that hv gone through...

and ..

this year...

onli ...

onli...i start 2 gone up the hill of relationship with my mum ....





still cauz ...

cauz..

by this human ...

i gone down the hill 2 the beginning ...



so how....

who can help me ...







make this bcome a dream ...

not happen in the real....



please.....

his birthday......^_<

happy and sad day..........

26/12/2008,Friday,a nice day

his birthday ...

ming ren ...and his twins brother ....ming shiaw....

this is the 1st time their frens celebrate with them...

this may noe by us.....

after a pratice for next year "yin chun hui "

we go celebrate birthday for them at " star restaurant "

after i lie 2 him tat i go buy some things 2 b use in programme...

he doesn't doubt that i was going buy cake for them ...

in celebration , we play them with drawing their face with the cake....

we can't think tat they sit quietly for us 2 drawing for them....

they was so pity.....haha^^

the non wasting ming ren ...pick up the cake on the table 2 eat....

cant think .....

right?? haha....

but we really hv so much of pleasure that day ...

photo show time..

bt not much ..haha^^

c!!twins that love 2 show ..^^

this photo take quiet so dark

sad part...

pressure in heart...

cauz of a bsmm programme ...

i quarrel with my fren ..

she had take away my last chance of complete a one day programme...

and my relationship with my mum hv broke down...

i dun understand ....

i hv cry oso 2day....

i think...

onli the one chance 2 cry ...

y i nv cry out as much as i could....

as wat ming ren say a long time ago....

my heart hv draw a blank in that time....

i dun wan this happening ...

somebody ...i hope can help me ....

i really dun wan make this problem goin with me so long time ...

and my life with my family was got somemore a long journey....

make this thing over ...

please...

GOD....

TEACH ME HOW 2 SOLVE IT...

PLEASE!!

the boy ...in my mind..^^

uncontrol..

can't think ...

the boy

he ..

cried...

after i pick my phone..

he was on cryng ...

i shiver...

my hand ..

shiver uncontrol....

my mind was in confuse...

wat happen .

wat should made him cried...

cried that i nv seen bfore...

in my mind ..

i always think that he is a very strong guy ...

he will not fall down under a small small thing ...

i can't call off my heart and my shivering hand...

i so scard ...

i wan c him on that time..

but i was at cousin house...

on the time...

i jz have a think tat i wan meet him now.

i felt worry ...

i cant calm down ...

i jz can think in many way...

wat happen ...

wat happen 2 him ??

the 2nd day...

i call him...

and i go meet him ..

un known by him...

when i call..

he was dreaming...

he was in his dream world...

his brother call upon him.

we meet outside his house...

grassland ...

we sit on the swing...

i prepaid my self...

i start b his audience...

can b noe ...

he was controlling his mood...

his feeling ...

can b feel...

he wan cry ...

but he control it ...

wat i can do...

i quiet myself...

i sit and start 2 dissolve in his talk ...

start 2 b with him ...

in the same position with him...

but the god ...

it playing us...

not more than half of a hour.....

the sky cry ...

in my way ...

the rain have gone through with his tear ...

his tear flow down with the rain ...

we didnt stand under the rain ...

bt i can noe...

his heart have dissolve with the rain ...

he cry in heart...

6.oo p.m. he nid 2 go ...

he nid 2 go 2 his cousin house...

somebody have gone 2 the next world which r more beauty and peace from here...

i gv an advise...

if u wan 2 cry ..

u should cry...

u could not keep it in ur heart ...

it will b a burden ...

a very heavy burden ..

it will make u can't breath...

u have a big touch in ur heart ...

bcauz ur mind hv stay with ur cousin feeling ...

u r jz like him...

he is u ...and u was he...

that's y ..

u hv such a big , strength feeling...

i wan 2 thx 2 u ...

u hv made me as a fren which can b ur audience

2 hear ur heart...

a load on ur's mind ...

thx...

i will go with u...

remember ...

here was a girl waiting for u ...

dun ask y i'm waiting ...

i jz wan 2 tell u ...

i will b very volunteer 2 b with u

and always ready my self ...

2 b ur audience ...

2 go through all the difficulty with u ...

in ur life...

i ll waiting ...

waiting for u....